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Raising awareness of homelessness

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By attorney Donald E. Arnold (state bar number: 202148). In 2005, Arnold was homeless in the Antelope Valley.

Don Arnold (contributed)
Don Arnold (contributed)

I used to see a homeless person and I usually deliberately looked away. When I did look, I thought: What’s wrong with you? Why don’t you go to McDonald’s and flip burgers or something?

Having started my own work career at age 14, as a dishwasher, and having put myself through college and law school, I felt I had the right to question their motivation while formulating my own opinions about how they arrived on the street and why. If I was willing to wash dishes, why weren’t they?

I know now that one really never knows why a person is homeless, although one may think they know. I also know now that one has a tendency to lose things while on the streets; for example, wallets with driver’s licenses and Social Security cards. Most of us know that obtaining employment or benefits like Social Security Disability, State Disability and General Relief (welfare) requires identification. After all, in today’s world we have to prove who we are.

But did you know it costs $27 to get a duplicate driver’s license issued in the State of California, and you can’t get a replacement Social Security card without other identification (e.g., a driver’s license or a birth certificate, which most homeless persons do not carry with them)?

And how does one work if they have nowhere to shower, no address or phone number, and/or nowhere to keep one’s clothes (except in a plastic bag stored in the desert or a shopping cart)? Many if not most of us are one paycheck away from being homeless. Think about it: If you were in an automobile accident tomorrow, and were injured such that you were unable to work for a year or more, could you pay your mortgage/rent/utilities/credit cards/etc., on two-thirds of your salary (the standard disability rate, which also reaches a maximum of about $1,000)? Or what if you were laid off and unable to find work for a year? Could you make it? Do you have a year of salary in savings?

There is a solution: Permanent Supportive Housing. Permanent Supportive Housing (PSH) cures homelessness, rather than perpetuate it with a “Band-Aid” approach. The concept is simple and proven: remove the homeless individual from the streets by providing a home and the necessary services to stabilize a recovery process and reintegrate into society. Services such as: A “home” with an address and phone number; job training; job placement assistance; health care; drug and alcohol rehabilitation; financial education; and legal assistance.

What follows is my story. I set it to paper with the hope of raising awareness of homelessness, and with the hope of raising funds for much-needed Permanent Supportive Housing. I’m trying to point out that people on the street are not who you think they are, and that the homeless deserve more than a look of contempt when we pass them by, if we look at them at all.

My story*

I never thought I’d grow up to be homeless. I can’t be blamed for that; “homeless” wasn’t in my vocabulary when I grew up. My 16-year-old daughter knows the word though. You know the word. And so does everyone else.

Most don’t like to say it. Most don’t like to see it. But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist.

Don Arnold in front of Courson Park in Palmdale. (contributed)
Don Arnold in front of Courson Park in Palmdale. (contributed)

Homelessness…

You may think that because I am homeless, you know who I am. I do not believe that is true. You may think that because I am homeless, I must be lazy; I assure you that I am not. And you may think I don’t have an education, yet I do: a Bachelor’s of Science in Engineering from California State University at Northridge, and a Juris doctorate (Law Degree) from Southwestern University School of Law. There’s a lot people don’t know about me.

For example, I was in the top 10 percent of my class for the first two years of law school. That was a lot of work and quite an accomplishment, considering I also worked 50 to 60 hours a week, not including the hour drive from Palmdale to work and the hour drive from work to school and the hour drive from school to home each night. On a typical day I left home at 4 a.m., arrived at work by 5 a.m., and left for school at 4 p.m., Monday through Thursday. I arrived back home (I owned one then) at 11 p.m. I stranded a wife and a toddler, except Friday nights and all day Saturday, when I cared for my daughter while my wife went to school for a Teaching Credential.

I did homework when I got home from school and when I could on Saturdays. There is a lot of homework in law school, and I did most of it, which my grades reflected. I also received superior reviews at work, five stars, which was a review many coveted but few received. Then the Southwestern University Law Review invited me to join their publication after my first year of law school because of my high grades. This added another 10 to 20 hours per week to my already busy schedule and, ultimately, Law Review decided to publish the article I wrote. As a member of Law Review and the Law Review class, I was required to write it; however, they were not obligated to publish it. In fact, they don’t publish most articles, yet they published mine (28 Sw.U.L. Rev. 677, 1999). Lucky me: More hours as I edited and perfected my article.

My first job was washing dishes when I was 14. I worked through high school and I put myself through college, working. I’ve always worked. I am not lazy, and I am not uneducated.

I am a recovering alcoholic and addict, though I once went eight years without a drink. I started Law School during that period without a drink, when I had five years sober. But then I started taking prescription medicine: Soma, Xanax and Midrin. I had backaches, stress and headaches. I became addicted, and I suffered. I was sober but not clean.

I suffer from major depression, recurrent, perhaps as a result of enduring child molestation for eight years when I was a kid. That diagnosis makes me mentally ill (DSM-IV 296.35) and a “mental health patient,” though I’m better now that I consistently take medication as prescribed like I am supposed to. (Oops! I don’t think I am supposed to end a sentence with a preposition. I learned that in grade school, or maybe high school, or maybe college or law school. Maybe all four. The point is, I should know better.)

I should also know better than to smoke crack. After all, I passed the Bar on my first attempt (SBN 202148) and I have a Bachelor’s of Science in Engineering: Emphasis, Thermal Fluids. That’s Rocket Science. I’m a “Rocket Scientist,” so I cannot be stupid, right? But what kind of idiot would smoke crack when they have so much to live for? When they have a house, a beautiful daughter (the light of their life), two cats (no dogs, not even 1.5), and a six-figure salary? I mean, c’mon. Not me—right? Wrong.

I lost my job when the crack pipe became more important than my clients, more important than my employer, more important than my daughter. And also, apparently, more important than having a place to live. I sold my house when I couldn’t pay my bills because I wasn’t working. I wasn’t working because I got fired. I thought I was sick. Perhaps I was. Too sick to work? Perhaps not. Regardless, I used some of my profit from the sale of my home to pay six months of rent for another house and I then blew the rest, literally. I thought I would rest and get better. After all, I’d get it together now that I had money again, right? Wrong again.

I stopped seeing my daughter, I didn’t see friends, and I didn’t see family. They didn’t understand, but my new friends did. I bought a lot of drugs for my new friends. I also bought them a lot of food and cigarettes and alcohol. I gave them a place to live, at least until I got evicted, which happened when I ran out of money. True, I had my priorities mixed up. True, I should have known better. But I had stopped caring. I was suicidal.

Then I did the unimaginable. I became one of them. The word many of us don’t associate with anyone we know personally. Perhaps a word that we know yet do not wish to acknowledge. It’s a dirty word. They’re dirty. Lazy and on the streets because that is where they want to be. And I was one of them. Homeless.

I slept behind the dumpster in back of the Salvation Army Store, or in the park, the desert, and in the rain. I slept in County Jail or the psyche ward, or in the psyche ward at County Jail (they have one at Twin Towers-7th Floor). I didn’t have a car to sleep in because I no longer had a car. I didn’t care; I learned to ride the bus instead. Do you recognize me yet? Don’t you know who I am?

I’m the one who asked you for change for the bus because (reportedly) I got stranded in Lancaster going to the doctor and I needed to get back to Palmdale. I’m the guy who lost his shoes (or forgot where I put them) and had holes scorched in the bottom of his socks by pavement heated to extremes by the summer sun. The burning summer sun. I showered at the public pool because there was nowhere else to go. I ate Kentucky Fried Chicken out of the dumpster, because KFC couldn’t give you the extra food they had left over at the end of the night—they were required to throw it away. (At least they put it in a bag for us.)

I was the dirty one, the crazy one, the one who smelled like alcohol. The one you may have ignored. The homeless one. (You’d drink too if you had my problems.)

Some statistics: There were over 3,500 homeless persons in the Antelope Valley in 2005, which was the year I became homeless, and over 80,000 in the greater Los Angeles County area. (See 2005 Greater Los Angeles Homeless Count here.) There is also only one shelter in the Antelope Valley, then and now, which is limited to providing 10 beds during the normal season (March 15 through Nov. 15), and 50 beds during “cold weather” season (Nov. 16 through March 14). The most recent count — according to the most recent survey (2013) released by the Los Angeles Homeless Services Authority (LAHSA) — shows the number of homeless in the Antelope Valley area (SPA1) increased to 6,957, even though the overall homeless population has decreased to 53,798 in the greater Los Angeles area. (View the report here.)

I have a few more things to say. First, I’m better now and no longer homeless, thanks to Proposition 36, Tarzana Treatment Center, psychotropic medication, and most importantly— GOD. Thank God (literally) someone cared. I’m clean and sober, and I’m practicing law again at the same firm that fired me in 2004 (though I nearly lost my law license during my “adventure.”) I also realize that I am blessed to have a career to return to (oops! I did it again…) to which I can return. Many don’t. I rent a small room in Tujunga, I have an old “new” car, and today it doesn’t matter that it’s 17 years old. After all, it beats the bus. Trust me (I’m a lawyer); it beats the bus.

What I strive for now is to raise awareness. Your awareness. The awareness of your neighbor, your co-worker, your child. People you know. And I want to help fix the problem—not just write about it— by raising money to help alleviate homelessness through the funding of supportive housing programs, like Tarzana Treatment Center.

A very wise person once said, “Every journey begins with a single step.” Consider this my first step: telling you who I really am. Can you take a single step? After all, it could happen to someone you know. Like me.

*NOTE: I wrote the original version of this story, which was then titled “It Could Happen to You,” in March 2007, shortly after the State Bar reinstated my law license. I now own a fancy car that is only four years old, I recently purchased a new home (my first home in nine years) in Santa Clarita that I share with my beautiful daughter, Lorilyn, who is now 23, and I celebrated nine years clean and sober on Nov. 18, 2014.

I am a success. Please let’s help the homeless recover like I did, by finding solutions, and not derogate them with irrational fears.

Disclaimer: The views expressed in this article are the author’s own and do not necessarily reflect the views of The AV Times.

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Editor’s note: Donald Arnold wrote this letter in response to a Feb. 27 article titled “Resident: ‘Tent cities’ in Lancaster are a grave public safety issue,” which was written by “a concerned Lancaster resident.”

[Email letters@www.theavtimes.com to submit a story to Your Issues | Your News.]

Filed Under: Opinion

29 comments for "Raising awareness of homelessness"

  1. I am lucky enough to have a job and full benefits. But people think just because I hold a good job that I am okay financially. By the time I pay my bills and my mortgage, and buy the little bit of food I can with each paycheck, I have very little left. I get no help from my family even though I have helped them abundantly. But each paycheck I make it and I never have to beg or borrow money. I struggle the most I think financially in my family but I save every single can or water bottle I get and every two weeks on Wednesday, when I can easily use the money for myself, I open my garage door and give ALL my cans to an African American man who goes through the garbage cans to collect them for cash. Everyone can do their part, even if you have little to give. When this man comes to my street, I take the two LARGE bags of cans/water bottles from my garage and walk them to him. He is thankful each time. This may not sound like a good deed to many of you, but with my LARGE 40 lb bags packed to capacity, I am sure this man gets about $10.00 from these bags – $20.00 a month from me. People get angry when the homeless go through their trash cans but I can guarantee, if you were in their shoes and had no money, you too would be doing anything you can to make a few extra dollars. To protect myself, I shred all my mail now and I am completely comfortable with them going through my trash cans for cans. However, I now nicely save and pack them so that I can hand the cans to this man like a human being.

  2. You made me see things so differently, i made a promsie not only to myself , but to god. I was going to church every weekend, and always wondered where did al this money go? During tis time the article about the ‘tent cities’ in the Antelope Valley was shown right here on this very site, I thought to myself there has to be a way to help. I am sure not everyone who is homeless has some drug or alcohol problem, and even then some people have fall backs and need support and help to get back on their feet. I have something i want to ask for all of those reading this, around the month of January 2015, a man stood playing a guitar, it was a cold, and raining this night. he was standing in front of the Dollar Tree on Ave. S and 47th St. East. He looked white, spoke clear English. That night i only had my credit card and i don’t like driving during rainy whether due to the increase chance of an accident. But if anyone knows this man, if his description or location seem anywhere near to where you know, tell me where he is now.. i owe him an apology and much more than a meal. I have felt this guilt in my head for now 5 months. I remember his words clearly when i was going towards my car, ”stay warm..” I knew then i made the worst decision in my life. I could have gone out of my way and bought him a warm meal or two, a hot drink, water, but i did not. To this day even the reasons i wrote down for not doing so are no excuse. Months have gone by and i still remember this man. I know that there are many others like him that are in search of help, food, and care. I know now that when i am faced with something like this what I will do, but if anyone has sen this man who appears to be white playing a guitar, he looked under the age of 40, and i believe that night he had a black sweater, respond please, if you know now where this man is tell me. Thank you.

  3. DON, I am in the same boat addicted to drugs, lost hope . I want to go to school for criminal law to make a change on our screwed up system. Idk anybody that can help. All resources seem to be misleading. Any suvgestions

  4. I was someone who had a life.I worked 6 days a week 16 hours a day then I became ill.The doctors made my situation sound so grim I walked away from my job and friends to not burden them with my illness. I moved into a small place behind my landlords house.None of this was to drugs or alcohol. I had a really evil landlord. They did an eviction behind my back and since they had the only key to the mail box they got away with it. I went from having 3 cars and a home to living on the streets within hours.The whole event caused me to spiral into a breakdown which triggered a mental disability that I was born with and never knew. I’ve taken so many tinkle tests from people thinking “homeless got to be drugs” only for each doctor to apologize. I never knew how to ride the city bus lol. People who owed me money literally told me it would be smarter on them to hope I get killed on the streets rather then spend the next 20 years paying me. I had my dogs with me and a sanctuary in lancaster said I could keep them there without worry of payment. She even gave me some money to move my stuff once I could get the police to let me into my rental. The police failed me and the night I went to get the money from the atm I got mugged. I got my hip & knee dislocated and pulled the ligaments in my leg from defending myself. The doc said “I want to give you a muscle relaxer and I explained I don’t do that type of meds and also I’m homeless. I have to be able to limp fast lol. Then I called the lady with the sanctuary and she said I didn’t deserve my dogs and wasn’t giving them back. I wanted to die. I had enough. Another homeless person jumped on top of me and stayed squishing me on the ground for countless hours until I promised not to kill myself and my depression grew more.
    I was the girl who donated to 53 charities a month, bought 40 baskets of food for hungry people at Christmas & Thanksgiving instead of buying myself a present, I gave thousands of dollars away to people on the streets and I was now one of them.
    Now, I live in a small trailer with a landlord who thinks me not having heat and hot water is funny but hey, I’m off the streets.Because she knows I have a mental disability she calls me names and discriminates against me but I’m off the streets. Mentally disabled people doesn’t mean STUPIDITY and HOMELESS doesn’t mean LAZY. It means their hurt in some way so STOP KICKING.
    I’m glad things worked out for you but most of all I”m glad your Daughter has her Daddy back!

  5. I am you Don! I went from a 3700 sq.ft. house to being homeless and addicted after my husband died and my son died 3 months after that. I was 55 at the time, and became addicted, living on the streets for 10 years. I am 69, have a roof over my head, and have been clean for 4 years now. I praise God for all His blessing, and now I take water, food, and other necessities to my friends on the street. Thank you my Heavenly Father for using me for Your Glory! I love all of your comments, all so inspiring.

    • Another favorite verse:

      Philippians 4:12

      12 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.

  6. reading this from Michigan! Praise the Lord is all I can say! This is a story that screams Luke 6 :37-42. Do not Judge! I love 41 and 42, “why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye ?” We never know someone’s story until we take the time to know them and pray for them. Imagine if when we walked by someone who was homeless we prayed for them instead of shrugging them off? Loving them instead of ignoring them. Don, God bless you. May the Lord continue to heal your heart and mind with His unfailing love. You are a walking testimony. Keep up the great work!

    • Thank you immensely Bethann. This is one of my favorite verses:

      22 Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. James 1:22.

      May God bless you and keep you –|—-

  7. Hi, Don,
    I met someone very similar to you in Shelter Island about 18 years ago. He was a renowned attorney that lost his million dollar home in Point Loma under the same circumstances. He was so smart that my boss would buy him lunch or dinner and he would sit there chatting with him about possible investments or asked him general questions in regards to applicable business laws. This homeless person was a kind man and the community helped him out with food and clothing, but his addiction was too strong to leave it behind. I often wonder what happened to him, he lost his wife and children and was severely depressed. I try not to judge homeless people, I feel their pain and give out as much money as I can spare. You are absolutely right, we are all only one paycheck away from homelessness, scary but true. Society needs to help out more, they spend more money on a Starbucks coffee or a video game, drop the unnecessary purchases and lend a hand. God is watching you!

  8. Your story is beautiful! I can relate so much to it. I have a best friend named Denee, we took 5 yrs clean & sober together I now have almost 10 years and she was murdered on the streets of Palm Springs 3 weeks ago by another homeless man. She went back out after 5yrs clean and sober, she was in and out of the program for 4 years while being homeless ( her decision) I did all I could which included staying on the streets late at night asking every homeless person I could find if they had seen her. I got to know a lot of them and brought them food while I sat there waiting to see if I could find her. They were all amazing people who suffered from mental illness and addiction. I wish with all my heart that my best friend Denee would have excepted the countless offers from me and her family to get help but she never did:/ now I will miss her beautiful soul for the rest of my life. I am so very proud of you Don! You are an inspiration to people who have never even met you (me):) I thank God for your 2nd chance and pray for every homeless person out there for there’s! God bless you and your family.

  11. Congratulations! I am proud of you. I agree with your plan. I used to try and decide if a homeless person or those who ask for financial help out in the street appeared to deserve it, they made me uncomfortable, it was inconvenient, but most of all I wondered if they “deserved” it. For many years now (yes this homeless problem is not new) I have lifted my own burden of judgment. I decide that it doesn’t matter if they deserve it, or if they are lying, or if they will use it for drugs or alcohol, or whatever. I now just give them what I have with a happy heart and I pray for them and with them. I would like to thank you for starting up a real solution. Our family does what we can as far as donating and helping but we can always do more.

  12. I’m writing it is a great story. Lord has plans for us all and makes us go through things that is u bearable. I havea 22 yr do, son whom is mild retarded and is going through depression and tried to kill him slef. There is nota day that goes by I don’t sit and cry inside knowingly as a mother I can not fix this but give hi. Support a find ways to help him where it is needed. I want to say to you my god bless you and give you the best to Coe. In life.

  13. I know who you are. I am you. At least, our stories are very similar. I’m not quite as far as you along my path of repairing my life, but one day at a time! Right?? Congrats on your recovery! Thank you for sharing your story! And helping. You are so accurate about what is needed for the homeless to rebuild our lives! Thank you!! :)

    • Bless you Dawn. Yes, one day at a time. And willingness….. without willingness to change you will have nothing more than you had before :-)

  14. YES! I have been following the news of housing being provide in Utah with amazing results. I am convinced that this is the best possible way to really help people.
    Thank you for being so open about your experience. I pray that other people will look at finding solutions.
    Another new resource here in AV is the Antelope Valley Rescue Mission on Yucca, just west of Division.

  16. Wow! Thank you for writing this article. For me this is an eye opener because I would think all that you said. I normally help out the homeless with any change I may have and hope they don’t use it on drugs or alcohol. I also do believe we do need more housing to get the homeless out of the streets and get them help. Congrats to getting your life back.

  17. I am glad to hear that you were able to beat your addiction and get back up on your feet. I hope you are able to reconcile the relationship with your daughter. Maybe other people who are down and out will see this and realize that there is still hope.

    • Hi Shawnee. Thank you for your comment. I wanted to let you know that I have an AMAZING relationship with my daughter today. She is the 23 year-old referenced in the “NOTE” at the end of the article, who lives with me in Santa Clarita today :-)

  19. Thank you for your story. Maybe enough folks will read it and be educated. I lived on the streets in my youth and know how hard it can be. All it took for me was to find somebody who cared enough to help me out, to get me started with a job and place to live.

  21. I encourage all readers to visit my website at no2know.org for additional information on permanent supportive housing, and how it is proven to work. Unfortunately my website is somewhat outdated and the corporation I started to raise awareness of and money for homelessness, No2Know, is currently suspended by the State of California because life comes back and, quite honestly, I got busy again. I need to find time to rejuvenate my passion. Until I do, please visit your local agency (i.e., Grace Resource Center) and volunteer and get to know these people. It is a blessing you will not regret. And of course donations are always welcome there or anywhere where it can make a difference.

  22. Congrats on your sobriety and being clean! Life can throw us some hard curves now and then. While never being truly homeless, I have lived out of my car to save commute costs so my family would be better of. While doing so I met a few people with educations yet jobless. It can happen for many reasons.
    I like the idea of PSHs. Wish it were easier to convince local and state governments to build and staff them.